Knowing ourselves is crucial to having good relationships – it’s not the only factor, but it certainly plays a huge role in the dynamics and healthiness of our inter-personal connections.
As we seek to understand ourselves better, we have the uncomfortable task of paying attention to the ways that we are seeking specific things from the people we seek out, and when there is a pattern of unsatisfying, conflict-plagued, or volatile dynamics, it is worth asking – “why am I drawn to connections like this?” which in turn shines the light on the deeply uncomfortable reality that our unconscious reactive protective mechanisms replay stories, and we fulfil them: “I am hard to love” – “I am a block of concrete who doesn’t have feelings” – “I am too much”. As we understand ourselves more deeply, we are able to seek out connections that nourish and nurture everyone involved, because we are showing up in those spaces authentically, and vulnerably.
If this is tugging on your attention, perhaps its time to find out more. 🙂
